Wildly inconsistent.

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Friday, 25 November 2016 @ 00:18
I hate changes, or more specifically, I hate being out of my comfort zone. It's a miracle (and blessing) I like to travel.

This past 1-2 years has been so full of changes I am still struggling to catch up. I've changed jobs again (yay). I honestly thought 2015 was shitty but 2016 turned out worse (not because of the world news I am not that far sighted).

I lost a friend who died by suicide. And I feel so selfish (because really, it's for my comfort) saying this but I miss her so much. We started work at my previous company on the same day, and I saw her, this young looking girl also at the office, and I remember saying to myself "Omg is she also a designer? I must do better than her." But nah she turned out to be in the marketing team and also one of the best colleagues ever.

The year before I lost an acquaintance, also to suicide. We weren't close but we saw each other a few times after graduating, mostly at parties. His funeral was the 4th I'd attended in the span of 6 months.

Aunt, grandfather, friend's father, friend, friend's father, friend's father, friend's brother, friend, friend's grandfather, neighbour. 10 in total. May the number stop increasing. I'm not sure I can take it.

I lost a few other friends because I think it was bound to happen at some time but I found out about 1 person's shitty behaviour and it was the last straw so I (we?) cut them off first. We had some good times. But good times don't last. Sometimes it feels like I wasn't as important to them as they were to me but I guess it's unfair to compare like this, 'my expectations of them based on my experiences' vs real life.

All I can say is oh well. Life goes on.

2017 give chance please.

I should add on, I have been finally invited to a wedding, a baby's full month celebration and another baby's 1st birthday. Hooray finally!!! My first wedding and baby's full month. Gotta think positive.

Good night.

Wanted to write more but I knocked out so here I am. Again.

I recently realised that I do have a favourite colour or a colour I am biased towards (green) and the type of things I watch and read in the same period of time always have the same theme (currently Murakami for books and sci-fi for tv).

Thanks to Livia's recommendation I read my first Murakami novel Kafka on the Shore and devoured it during my Busan trip. After reading 2 more of his novels, Norwegian Wood and Sputnik Sweetheart and several short stories, I read Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage. I think my favourite is Kafka, but it's mostly because of the cats. The other 3 books sort of mesh into each other because the themes (loneliness, sense of self, loss) and even the main character was so similar sometimes I have trouble separating them from each other (maybe I shouldn't have read all of them at the same time).

I'm not sick of it yet. I have found a comfortable reading zone in Murakami books and I'm so glad I didn't read his books earlier because it wouldn't have resonated with me as much, especially Norwegian Wood.

As always, reading opened up a whole new world for me and I find out about so many things that are new to me and I'm so happy I decided to start reading again. Thank you Murakami for helping to rekindle this reading habit with your sometimes weird af but relatable stories.

"Ah! Böwakawa poussé, poussé."

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New job!
Wednesday, 26 August 2015 @ 10:40
Erm sad to say I have not touched anything on my to-do list in FREAKING MAY LOL. And I need to add on or maybe I shouldn't if not I won't do it lol. Erm nothing much just wanted to say I changed jobs (Aug 3) and I have my own office.

J/k it's a temp seat until they get my seat fixed or something... This is actually a small meeting room that is connected to my boss's office (door on the right side, out of pic).

Anyway that's all. Bye.

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